MAKING THE COMPLEX CLEAR FOR
BETTER POSITIONING & BETTER OUTCOMES
IN YOUR DIVORCE
EXPERT KNOWLEDGE & SUPPORT TO NEGOTIATE WITH CONFIDENCE
Regardless of who chose it or why, divorce can be a soul-crushing, time-consuming and costly experience. You feel like Alice down the rabbit hole. Up is down. Right is left. And you don’t know how long the drop is, let alone how you will survive the landing. It feels like everything in your life is at risk and out of your control. Most people think hiring an attorney right away is the answer. It's not. Once you file for divorce, you're on the court's timeline, not yours. And the attorney you hire has closer, longer term relationships with the other attorneys in the court house corridors than they will ever have with you. Your life is too important to get cookie-cutter legal positioning, which is all but guaranteed to result in less than ideal outcomes.
There is a better, smarter way. And that starts with you having the emotional tools and frameworks to detach from your soon-to-be-ex, know what you want and make confident decisions that serve you and your future self. Next, a detailed financial analysis gives you a roadmap for informed negotiation. And lastly, you hire an attorney to initiate the legal process. With all your ducks already in a row, you save big money in legal fees and a world of stress.
Smart Divorce Strategy is here to support and guide you through every part of this experience. Through customized coaching and consulting services, I am your coach, your knowledge expert, your project manager and your advocate. Together, we create a customized strategy to leverage efficiencies and streamline the process as much as possible. You don't have to re-create the wheel and you don't have to do this alone.
KNOWLEDGE MINIMIZES FEAR
The average length of divorce in the U.S. is 12 months. And with the court system pushing simple cases into mediation, it means that the more complicated cases with long-term marriages, children and high net worth take a lot longer than a year and cost substantially more than the average of $30,000. And personally, there's a lot at stake here for you, your children and your financial future.
Divorce is a lot like playing chess and poker at the same time. You're never really sure which game you're playing at any given moment. You're constantly in doubt about whether it's the right time to move a piece or play your hand. And you don't know if your (or their) next move is strategy or bluff. Even when you think you know the rules, common mistakes result in poor decisions and undesirable outcomes.
With all the moving pieces, divorce only gets more complicated (with the legal fees compounding over time) when you add other variables into the mix, like mental health and personality disorders, addiction, narcissism, stalking and abuse. And then there's the invisible landmines, such as unrealistic expectations, lack of knowledge and negative attachment, that are equally as damaging to your timeline, bank account and stress levels.
Biology is working against you as well. Big change is subconsciously perceived as big threat. And since your mind can't distinguish between what's real and what's imagined, it believes you are under attack and floods your body with stress chemicals, like cortisol and adrenalin, to put you in Fight-Flight-Freeze-Faint. You can't fully access your executive function from that place, which is necessary for problem-solving, decision-making and memory. I call it The Fear-Stress Cycle and it's almost impossible to break free from on your own. It continually puts you in the worst future you can imagine. And it limits your ability to do exactly what you need to right now: know what you want, create a solid legal position and negotiate with confidence.
In my experience, the best way to get out of The Fear-Stress Cycle is to be present in this moment and get the support and knowledge you need to make this scary, unknown place known. Knowledge minimizes fear. With so much at stake, you need expert knowledge and support to move forward with a solid strategy that will give you control, reduce your anxiety and allow you to better navigate this mine field.
THE EXPERIENCE TO KNOW WHAT MATTERS
Laura Miolla is the Founder & CEO of Smart Divorce Strategy. Since 2012, she's been empowering clients as a divorce coach with the tools and emotional support to minimize fear, make smart decisions and use their divorce experience for learning and growth. She launched Smart Divorce Strategy in 2021 to offer consulting services, in addition to coaching, to help clients better navigate this process, and all its moving pieces, from start to finish.
Laura is a Professional Certified Coach (CPCC & PCC), Mediator & Parentology Coach. She is trained in the Co-Active© Coaching methodology, The Neuroscience of Change, The Foundations of Great Coaching, Positive Intelligence and Red Team Thinking.
She hosted a national radio show called Divorce Sucks: The Smart Girl's Guide To Doing It Better in 2015 and is an accomplished writer with publications in Huffington Post, Working Mother Magazine and Parents Magazine, among others. Her articles and videos can be accessed on the Blog, Media, Press and Speaking Engagement pages. And you can learn more about her on the About page.