Our wedding rings and dresses are tangible symbols of what we hoped our marriage would be. Now, post-divorce, what do we do with them? Watch my brief video to get some ideas that will help you choose for yourself!
I know there is a trend these days to have divorce parties, fire paint balls at your wedding dress with your best friends or celebrate in some other wild fashion. That wasn't my experience though. After a really long and incredibly stressful divorce, I didn't feel like celebrating at all. I was tired. I was battered. I was in shock. And I was incredibly sad. Every woman I've ever coached (myself included) goes through a grieving period. We aren't grieving the reality of our marriages. We are grieving the dream of what we had thought marriage was ... our dreams of what we wanted it to be. And the reality was never even close. We have all been sabotaged by fairy tales that sell us on this idea of marriage. And we all bought it hard. So, inevitably, the loss of that dream deserves to be grieved. Even in the beginning , I judged myself for having that dream at all. I mean, isn't it stupid to believe in fairy tales in our world? By the end of my divorce, I didn't judge myself. I was just sorry that I had lost that innocent piece of myself who believed those things. Walking through that fire forced me to really understand who I am and who I strive to be in a truly intentional way that I hadn't experienced before. And it was worth it. My relationship with myself, my children, my partner, my world is better than any dream I used to have. Letting go of the beliefs that were handed to me .... and deciding what I wanted for myself ... unlocked the door to limitless possibility that I am beyond grateful for today. Remember, struggle is a natural part of life ... but suffering is a choice.